MY STREET DIARY
I have been utterly humiliated and disgraced. You've heard Scott &
Raquel's side of the story, now you should hear the truth.
Before I get into why I was fired, I would like to describe the manner in
which I was removed from Silentt. First I hear a call over the intercom
saying that anyone with an "August" birthday should come to the lunch
room for Birthday Cake. Of course, I headed straight up. When I
arrived I found only Raquel & New General Manager Ted Lexxus, with no
cake. They explained that in a cost-cutting move, I'd been laid off.
In shock, I asked if I could collect the things in my desk. Ted
responded that it would be impossible, because my desk had just been
bulldozed. Raquel came up to me and said "I'm sorry little fellow. I'm
just doing my job. I take no joy in this. Let me just escort you out in
a dignified manner." So we walked thru the crowded newsroom and about
mid-way, Raquel reared back and kicked me in the rump. Not a glancing
blow.. but straight into the orifice. I collected myself in front of my
hushed co-workers and continued on past my bulldozed desk. Raquel
kicked me about five more times before I made it out the door. I never
saw Scott thru the whole ordeal.
For the record, I never flirted with Scott's ex-wife. I did lampoon Scott
at every chance I got, but he needed to be taken down a notch or two.
For my honesty, I'm now living on the streets of Durham. But don't feel
sorry for me. I will survive. As you can see I've already started my
own website, during the limited time I get to use the public library
internet. Keep me in your thoughts and keep checking this website.
I'll be making a street diary, so you folks can follow along with my
journey. I will be back on top one day, and I'll bring my friends with
me.
If anyone has an extra walk-in closet that I could live in for a few
months, I'd be very grateful. I have a box I live in now, but the
landlord charges too much for it and he's very strict.
Here's a nice couple I did meet in Durham. Durnell & Connie Bickerstaff, according to their checkbook. I think I startled them when I walked in front of their car while using the knife I got in the Faulkland Islands to carve an apple. They stopped and seemed to want to help me. Connie tossed her wallet at me and then they continued on their way. I guess they want me to get the address off their driver's license and stop by their house sometime. What great folks!
The interview that got me in so much trouble!
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